Holding Position

First, we’re assum­ing the scene is severe enough, that hold­ing posi­tion is a real issue. We’re not just play­ing tippy-​​tap. This might include full-​​armed swings with some imple­ment — so let me first address the safety issue.

What if you move at just the wrong time? Is a full-​​armed stroke with a hair­brush on the back of your hand a good thing? Hands are del­i­cate — any­thing wooden which was intended for your bot­tom but hit­ting your hand… could cause quite seri­ous and pos­si­bly per­ma­nent damage.

In the case of a hand spank­ing, reach­ing back at the wrong time could mean acci­den­tally bend­ing your fin­ger the wrong way. Again, this is unin­tended injury. If there is a missed stroke dur­ing a full-​​horsepower can­ing… well… even with Hal­loween and hor­ror movie sea­son approach­ing, we don’t want to go there.

There does seem to be com­mon agree­ment that safety issues are seri­ous, and non-​​negotiable. If the ses­sion in ques­tion is severe enough that hold­ing posi­tion is a prob­lem — in my opin­ion, that prob­lem must be solved. Because, it is a safety issue.

Get­ting her hands in the way is, of course, the most seri­ous — because hands are so eas­ily dam­aged. There are var­i­ous solu­tions… one is to restrain them out of the way; another is to see to it that the con­se­quences are so cat­a­strophic that it won’t hap­pen ever again. No way, nuh unh. Because, it is a safety issue. I must be able to trust that she’ll keep her hands out of the way. (Remem­ber, we are pre­sum­ing a con­sen­sual relationship.)

But… what about hold­ing posi­tion, in general?

Here’s where I need to repeat my dis­claimer. My phi­los­o­phy which fol­lows is prob­a­bly less appro­pri­ate for a DD rela­tion­ship, or when brat­ting is receiv­ing its just due. We are not talk­ing about hold­ing her down and warm­ing her bot­tom until she gets it together. That’s a valid approach, of course, but not what I’m address­ing here.

What I’m address­ing here is the issue of submission.

That is, I’m talk­ing about when the con­text of the scene has to do with sub­mis­sion (or per­ceived lack thereof). When I approach such a scene, it’s all about putting her head where it needs to be — and that means plac­ing her in a sub­mis­sive headspace.

In this con­text, she even­tu­ally comes to look on being tied down for pun­ish­ment as a priv­i­lege. She has the priv­i­lege of strug­gling all she wants, with­out hav­ing to hold posi­tion no mat­ter what. That may sound “out there” and it is… it’s a later result. First, how do we get there?

First, we are not talk­ing about hold­ing her down and warm­ing her bot­tom until she gets it together. On the con­trary, she’ll be coop­er­at­ing. If she can­not choose to accept her pun­ish­ment, we’ll wait until she can. (There may, of course, be other sanc­tions imposed in the mean­time, such as impound­ing her key­board.) Remem­ber that the rela­tion­ship is con­sen­sual, and required sub­mis­sion is what she wants.

Any­way, here’s my approach. Let’s assume the pun­ish­ment is six strokes of the what­ever, and she knows she can­not hold still for that.

You will bend over the back of the chair, plac­ing your hands on the seat. You will inform me when you are ready to begin. You will hold posi­tion until the six strokes are com­plete. You will hold posi­tion until I release you at the end of the six strokes.

You may break posi­tion at any time, if you decide you must. How­ever, if you do, we will still com­plete the six strokes, and then we will start over from the beginning.

I have always been con­fi­dent that even if a woman breaks posi­tion again the sec­ond time through, she will choose to hold posi­tion for the third time through.

The funny thing is… in my per­sonal expe­ri­ence, when she knows this is the case, she chooses to hold posi­tion the first time through.

And to me, that’s what it’s about. The whole point of the exer­cise is for her to choose to hold posi­tion no mat­ter what. To choose to sub­mit to what­ever he chooses to give her.

At play par­ties and such, when things are far less seri­ous than what’s being described above, I use Loopy Johnny for hand train­ing. (You can see a pic­ture of it at http://​www​.aswgt​.com/​l​o​o​p​y​.​h​tml)

The Loopy Johnny is all sting no thud; it’s three loops of rub­ber on a han­dle. Since the rub­ber is soft and flex­i­ble (but O so sting-​​y!), it’s very unlikely to dam­age any­thing. So, use the Loopy Johnny on her clothed back side, and when she reaches back with her hand, give her fin­gers a good nip with the Loopy. My do her eyes get big!!! With one sin­gle nip of the fin­gers, she’s cured of such silliness. :-)))))

So long as the safety issue is under­stood, it can most cer­tainly be solved in a num­ber of ways. Dif­fer­ent ways work for dif­fer­ent people.

I agree that the “hold­ing posi­tion” issue will be dif­fer­ent for dif­fer­ent peo­ple — it depends on the dynamic. If to strug­gle and cry is an accepted part of the sit­u­a­tion, I agree that it’s quite appro­pri­ate for him to hold your hand out of the way.

On the other hand, if “train­ing to stay in posi­tion” is part of the dynamic, a dif­fer­ent approach is appro­pri­ate. I described one such pos­si­bil­ity above.

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